GOP considers DELAYING CONVENTION

By GottaLaff

Howard Fineman, on MSNBC just now, suggested that the McCain campaign is going to go all humble and small and unpretentious on us. Know why? Because they've been outdone by powerhouse Barack Obama and his drop-dead-impressive acceptance speech, and they know it.

So what's a newly-housebroken J Sid to do? Why, according to Mr. Fineman, put off their own convention, and reinvent it as a puny townhall meeting. Probably wise, considering they can't seem to be able to fill their original venue. Obama, on steroids tonight, has cut J Sid down to size:

Republican officials said yesterday that they are considering delaying the start of the GOP convention in Minneapolis-St. Paul because of Tropical Storm Gustav, which is on track to hit the Gulf Coast, and possibly New Orleans, as a full-force hurricane early next week.

Oh, it's all about Gustav. We see.

"Senator McCain has always been sensitive to national crisis," said McCain spokesman Tucker Bounds, noting that the senator postponed announcing his presidential candidacy in 2000 because of the war in the Balkans.

Mr. Sensitive. Uh-huh. This has nothing whatsoever to do with the anemic, and inaccurate, response to Obama's blockbuster, in-your-face speech. Uh-huh.

Oh-h, but wait. There's an undercurrent to all of this (no pun):

A hurricane in the Gulf of Mexico could also cast unwelcome attention on the offshore oil rigs that McCain has championed as a solution to rising gasoline prices -- they are now being evacuated in the face of the coming storm.

So much for his energy policy. And who else might be cowering at the thought of Hurricane Obama?

White House press secretary Dana Perino said yesterday that it was "premature to say" whether the storm might have an impact on Bush's scheduled appearance Monday night.

Buh-bye, Georgie. Wait! I hear a familiar voice, and it's... yes, it's whimpering.

Some Republicans bemoaned an apparent GOP curse when it comes to summer storms and noted the contrast between the approach of Gustav and the sunny weather in Denver for the Democrats. "The Republicans can't seem to catch a break when it comes to August and when it comes to the weather," said Karl Rove, a former Bush adviser, on Fox News yesterday.

Awww. Rove can't catch a break. I have nothing but sympathy.

I lied.