MSNBC: Preen forward #OhButIKid

 

Oh, but I kid MSNBC. I watch it every single day, and despite it being the only major cable news outlet I can tolerate (or appreciate), there are a few observations that I can no longer keep to myself. Gotta vent. Here's my (satirical) take on MSNBC daytime:

MSNBC Host 1: So welcome to my very own show. So, today's guests are Goldie Taylor, Howard Fineman, David Corn, Joan Walsh, Michael Steele, Jonathan Alter, Michael Eric Dyson, Nicolle Wallace, Mark Halperin, Michael Isikoff, Jonathan Capehart, Kasie Hunt, Eugene Robinson, Ezra Klein, Dave Weigel, Steve Schmidt, and all my fellow MSNBC hosts who are all here to talk about their very own shows! Every single one of them. So have I told you guys what a great job you do? GOD you're good. You all excel at your jobs! To call you stellar doesn't do you justice! I'm so proud to call you "colleagues."

Chuck Todd, Steve Kornacki, Alex Wagner, Chris Hayes, Joy Reid, Ronan Farrow, Krystal Ball, Karen Finney, Melissa Harris-Perry, Ari Melber: So, thank you, my friend! So, congratulations to us! So, group hug to Camera Three!

MSNBC Host 2: So when we return, we'll explore why every MSNBC commentator begins each thought with, "So..." We'll be back in 15 minutes after these messages from Cialis, Cymbalta, Lipitor, Abilify, Celebrex, Humira, Nasonex, and Lyrica.

Chuck Todd, Steve Kornacki, Alex Wagner, Chris Hayes, Joy Reid, Ronan Farrow, Krystal Ball, Karen Finney, Melissa Harris-Perry, Ari Melber: So you forgot AT&T, BP, Exxon, Citibank, catheters, vaginal dryness meds, and Christian Mingle!

One hour later...

MSNBC Host 2: So here to help us make some sense of our top story is the host of [insert any MSNBC daytime show here]. Thanks for being here, Other Host.

Other MSNBC Host: So I'm honored, my friend. You are awesome.

MSNBC Host 2: So no, YOU are, my friend.

Other MSNBC Host: No, YOU! So.

Luke Russert: Um, hello? So did somebody forget to intro Tim Russert's trying-to-fill-his-father's-big-shoes son over here on the monitor? So I've got an exclusive I'm dying to break right here on your very own show, MSNBC Host 2!

MSNBC Host 2: So we could never forget YOU, Luke, my friend, my brother. What's your scoop? You always have the BEST scoops! GOD you're good.

Luke: So, so are you. You are a FABULOUS host, as are you, Other MSNBC Host. You two are superb at everything you do. Nobody does it better. So I'm in tears. Seriously. So how cool is it that we're all such good friends? So who knew being this incestuous could pay so well?

MSNBC Host 2: So tell us your scoop, Amazingly Adept Luke, my brother, my friend, MSNBC's own Sage of Washington DC, Our Capitol Hill Crusader! So don't you just love these obvious displays of public camaraderie? It's like our own private little club! So whatcha got, my friend?

Luke: Well crap. I forgot.

MSNBC Host 2: So we'll be back right after these words from Cialis, Cymbalta, Lipitor, Abilify, Celebrex, Axiron, Humira, Nasonex, Lyrica,  AT&T, BP, Exxon, Citibank, catheters, vaginal dryness meds, Febreze, Aleve, Verizon, Samsung, Cliffside Malibu Rehab Center, Christian Mingle, GE, financial groups you've never heard of, and endless promos of other MSNBC programming and the new MSNBC website!

One hour later...

MSNBC Host 3: So now for more repetitive analysis, welcome back to the hosts of all of our other fantastic shows. You all do such great work. Nobody does it better than you, my friends. GREAT reporting! You all look GREAT! Our audiences should be tuning into each of your shows every single day and night, no matter what effect that much exposure to redundant political infotainment has on their personal relationships!

Chuck Todd, Steve Kornacki, Alex Wagner, Chris Hayes, Joy Reid, Ronan Farrow, Krystal Ball, Karen Finney, Melissa Harris-Perry, Ari Melber: So Rachel has a very special Special coming up! Let's plug it! Over and over and over again!

MSNBC Host 3: I was just about to. But first, may I just say, you guys really set a high bar for journalistic standards. GREAT reporting, guys! But now it's time for the Tweet of the Day from Chris Matthews, MSNBC's very own god. But first: So when is Ezra Klein getting his own show already? He may put us to sleep in seconds, but he does such incredibly GREAT work! GREAT reporting! What a find! Am I right, my friends? Hey Farrow, stop giggling. So I'll get your responses to this and more on the other side of the commercial break. We have a new sponsor: ZzzKlein, er, Quil.

Fade out.

(Laffy Note: I didn't forget to include Lawrence O'Donnell, Chris Matthews, Ed Schultz, or Rachel Maddow in the Long Host List. While they do pop in on election nights or to promote a special or a book occasionally, they rarely guest on other shows as commentators/panel members.)

VIDEO: "The Better Marriage Blanket"... It's a gas!

By GottaLaff

Andrew Sullivan found this, and he believes it's legit:



Cool beans! I believe this is geared more toward old farts, and they could create quite a stink if they got wind of it. Personally, I think the ad is full of hot air, but I'm a little anal that way.

Video- Glenn Beck advertiser offers "survival seeds" as defense against "emerging totalitarianism"

And with the paranoid idjits that watch that clown, I'm sure they'll make a killing.

About That Glenn Beck Ad Boycott

Ha! /chris matthews laugh

A recent late November airing of "Glenn Beck" offered advertisers pushing gold and silver financial investments and services, older-skewing products and fringe nutritional products.

These include Lifestyle Lift (chin lift); an AARP Medicare product; and retirement homes, such as the TimeSharesOnly and The Villages in Florida -- the latter a community that Beck has done some extra promotional work around.

Friedman notes, "There is still no sign of top-drawer, higher-valued daytime TV advertisers, such as Procter & Gamble, Geico, Clorox, UPS Stores and Progressive Insurance. Their ads had previously appeared on the program."

Via TV Newser. More on the boycott here.

19 more advertisers ditch Glenn Beck

By GottaLaff

UPDATE: Complete list of dropped/remaining advertisers here, via @stopbeck on Twitter.

Via FDL:

[N]ineteen more of Beck's advertisers have stopped supporting his show. That number includes two British companies who just announced that they've pulled their ads from the UK broadcast of Beck's show after hearing from customers.

Two companies--Waitrose (the British supermarket chain) and Metropolitan Talent Management--pulled their ads not only from Beck's show, but from Fox News in general. [...] [Laffy Note: Original post about that here]

Here's the full list of new companies ditching Beck: AmMed Direct, Citrix Online, Concord Music Group, Diageo, Eggland's Best, Equifax, Eulactol USA (producer of Flexitol), GetARoom.com, Hoffman La Roche (maker of BONIVA), Metropolitan Talent Management, ooVoo, Overture Films, Scarguard, Schiff Nutrition (maker of Tiger's Milk and Fi-Bar), Seoul Metropolitan Government, Subaru, Toyota-Lexus, Waitrose and Woodland Power Products, Inc.

From the press release we're sending today:

Comments from advertisers recently distancing themselves from Beck:

"We will not be airing on that show [Glenn Beck] any longer," said Michael McHale, Director of Corporate Communications for Subaru of America, in a phone conversation with ColorOfChange.org.

"Lexus ads are not appearing on the Glenn Beck show," said Nancy Hubbell, Communications Manager for Lexus Prestige, in an email to ColorOfChange.org. "We have no plans to buy Beck," Hubbell later reiterated in a separate email to ColorOfChange.org.

"Please rest assured that we do not endorse Beck's views and are having our advertising agency request that Fox no longer air our advertisements during his shows," said John Mills, Director of Marketing for AmMed Direct, in an email to ColorOfChange.org.

"We are currently shifting our presence on the Fox Television network to a time slot that will not include the Glenn Beck television program," said Bernardo de Albergaria, Vice President of Global Marketing & eCommerce for Citrix Online, in an email to ColorOfChange.org. "I have received confirmation that Fox has been instructed to begin this transition immediately and I am advised it will be fully implemented by October 9th."

[Citrix Online pulled its advertisements from rotation on Glenn Beck's radio show in early September, but was recently contacted regarding ads that were recently seen on Beck's television show.]

"We did not specifically purchase time on Glen Beck [sic], rather the Fox News Channel as a whole," said Dino Balzano, Director of Advertising and Merchandise at Concord Music Group, in email to ColorOfChange.org. "But, of course, if we consider this ‘news cluster' purchase again in the future, we will only do so if we can be guaranteed to NOT be in that program."

"Pending further review, Eggland's Best has suspended TV advertising on the Glenn Beck show," said Katy Gray, a spokesperson for Eggland's Best, in an email to ColorOfChange.org.

"Equifax advertisements that appeared during the Glenn Beck Show were not specifically slated to air alongside the show and were purchased as part of a larger, rotational media buy on Fox Network," said Demitra L. Wilson, Director of Public Relations for Equifax, in an email to ColorOfChange.org. "We have taken the necessary steps to ensure that our ads will no longer appear during this programming."

"You will not see Flexitol commercials on the Glenn Beck show. Period," said John Swigert, Vice President and General Manager at Eulactol USA, makers of Flexitol, in an email to ColorOfChange.org.

"We asked to no longer run our commercial on the Glenn Beck show," said Bob Diener, President of GetARoom.com, in an email to ColorOfChange.org. "We were running on rotation and so did not know where the show would air."

"We are appalled at what's going on," said John Scher, co-CEO of Metropolitan Talent Management, in a phone conversation with ColorOfChange.org. "Metropolitan Talent Management is 100% dedicated to not buy advertising on any part of Fox News."

"We learned of this yesterday and have taken action to discontinue ads on that program," said Marty Walker, Chief Marketing Officer for ooVoo, in an email to ColorOfChange.org. "We gave the order to stop yesterday."

"We're no longer going to book any of his air time," said Adam Keen, Senior Vice President of Worldwide Publicity for Overture Films, in a phone message to ColorOfChange.org. "I'm really glad to be informed of what you guys are doing."

"We never, ever planned on advertising on that particular show," said Alan Graham, Marketing Vice President of Scarguard Labs, LLC, in a phone message to ColorOfChange.org. "We have taken the necessary steps to ensure we don't run ads there again."

"We have requested that they [Fox News] no longer run Schiff advertisements on that show," said Raquel Wilson, Director of Marketing for Schiff Nutrition, in an email to ColorOfChange.org. "We were not aware Schiff would be slotted on the Glenn Beck show."

"The Seoul government has no plan to extend, resume, or add its commercial on the program," said Joan E. Bloom, a US spokesperson for the city of Seoul, in an email to ColorOfChange.org. "In other word [sic], there will not be Seoul commercial in the Glenn Beck program any more."

"Our advertising is no longer running on that program," said Vincent VanOss, Director of Advertising for Woodland Power Products, Inc., in a phone message for ColorOfChange.org.

Thanks again for helping us hold Beck accountable.

Never underestimate the power of those who have ethics and sanity on their side.

Glenn Beck Has Lost over 50% of His Ad Dollars

By GottaLaff

This reminds me of that old ad in which a stereo sound system blasted so strongly that the listener had to hold on tightly to his easy chair so he wouldn't fly backwards, and his hair flew back as if in a wind tunnel.

Feel that blast of wind blowing you away, Blech?

Our campaign to hold Glenn Beck accountable for his race-baiting and fear-mongering has been a great success, with 62 advertisers making it clear that they don't want their brands linked to Beck's vile rhetoric. Up until now, however, there's been a question of what the real consequences are for Beck and for Fox, especially as Beck's ratings have soared. It's starting to become clear.

Ooo, ooo! Clarify! I'm ready. I'm holding on to my chair arms:

Today, we're announcing that Glenn Beck's show has lost over 50% of its advertising dollars since just before our campaign started. From our press release about the news:

The advertising boycott of Glenn Beck has cost the controversial host over half of his estimated advertising revenue since it was launched by ColorOfChange.org a month ago. This according to data analyzed from industry sources.

Estimated advertising revenue [the total amount of advertising money being spent during a block of commercial time for a program] was collected on a week-by-week basis for a period of two months. According to the data collected, the amount of money spent by national advertisers on Beck's program per week was at its highest at approximately $1,060,000, for the week ending August 2, 2009. ColorOfChange.org launched their campaign at the end of that week and since then, 62 advertisers have distanced themselves from Beck. Data collected for the week ending September 6, 2009 shows Beck's estimated ad revenue at $492,000, equal to a loss of $568,000.

"Fox News Channel has consistently claimed they haven't lost revenue as advertisers abandon Glenn Beck, but the numbers prove otherwise," said James Rucker, Executive Director of ColorOfChange.org. "Fox News Channel has a limited amount of ad positions. If 62 companies refuse to run ads on two of their 24 hours of programming, they are losing inventory. No matter how high Beck's ratings have been lately, advertisers still see Beck as toxic and don't want him associated with their brands. There is no way that Fox News Channel is making the money they should be making with Glenn Beck."

[...]

More than ever, it's time to keep the pressure on. You can help by joining us in thanking the advertisers that have stopped supporting Glenn Beck, and calling on those whose ads are still running on his show to follow suit.

Whoooosh!

H/t: Hippie_Cyndi

UPS drops ALL Fox advertising

By GottaLaff

I've always loved my UPS Guy. Brown is now my favorite color:

Rich Hallabran, spokesman for UPS Stores, said today he has not only temporarily halted buying ads on the Glenn Beck Show but also on the Fox News Channel altogether as reported by AP Television writer David Bauder

Congratulations to Color of Change [...]

And now, not only UPS but a total of 33 companies have joined the boycott, including Clorox, CVS, and Sprint.

While the UPS move is "temporary," UPS is still the first company to remove their advertising from Fox News altogether, instead of just directing that ads be placed in other advertising slots. [...]

The fallout from advertisers may well spill over into other controversial cable news shows.

The shows present a dilemma for advertisers, who usually like a "safe" environment for their messages. The Olbermanns, Hannitys, O'Reillys, Maddows and Becks of the TV world are more likely to say something that will anger a viewer, who might take it out on sponsors.

They also host the most-watched programs on their networks.

However, for the moment, we must allow ourselves to revel in this UPSless Glenn Dreck Schadenfreude moment:

Wal-Mart, CVS, Best Buy + 5 more dump Glenn Beck

By GottaLaff

Mmm, happy birthday to me! This is big:

[...] [E]ight more major advertisers have pulled their support from Glenn Beck's show -- Wal-Mart, Best Buy, CVS, Travelocity, Allergan (maker of Restasis), Ally Bank, Broadview Security, and Re-Bath.

Overall, twenty advertisers have now ended their support of Beck. [...]

From the press release we're sending right now:

Eight more Glenn Beck advertisers, including Wal-Mart -- the world's largest retailer -- have confirmed to ColorOfChange.org that they pulled their ads from the controversial Fox News Channel broadcaster's eponymous show. Allergan (maker of Restasis), Ally Bank (a unit of GMAC Financial Services), Best Buy, Broadview Security, CVS, Re-Bath, Travelocity and Wal-Mart join the dozen other companies who previously distanced themselves from Beck.

Twenty companies have pulled their ads from Beck's show in just the last two weeks. The moves come after the Fox News host called President Obama a "racist" who "has a deep-seated hatred for white people" during an appearance on Fox & Friends. Previous companies who pulled their ads include ConAgra, GEICO, Lawyers.com, Men's Wearhouse, Procter & Gamble, Progressive Insurance, RadioShack, Roche, SC Johnson, Sanofi-Aventis, Sargento, and State Farm Insurance.

"We are heartened to see so many corporate citizens step up in support of our campaign against Glenn Beck," said James Rucker, executive director of ColorOfChange.org. "Their action sends a clear a message to Glenn Beck: Broadcasters shouldn't abuse the privilege they enjoy by spewing dangerous and racially charged hate language over the air. No matter their political affiliation, hate language doesn't belong in our national dialogue."

"Walmart [sic] today confirmed the retailer pulled ads from the Glenn Beck show on August 3rd," said David Tovar, a spokesperson for Wal-Mart, in an email to ColorOfChange.org.

"While advertising on Fox is part of our communication plan, we had not requested time on Glenn Beck's show specifically," said Carolyn Castel, Vice President of Corporate Communications for CVS Caremark, in an email to ColorOfChange.org. "We have instructed our advertising agency to inform Fox to ensure Glenn Beck's program is not part of our advertising plan."

"Our position is simple," Castel continued. "We support vigorous debate, especially around policy issues that affect millions of Americans, but we expect it to be informed, inclusive and respectful, in keeping with our company's core values and commitment to diversity."

In an email exchange with ColorOfChange.org, Lisa Svac Hawks, Director of Public Relations for Best Buy, stated that any advertisements for Best Buy that were placed on Glenn Beck's show were done so in error. Svac Hawks pledged that Best Buy will correct any mistakes made.

"We did not specifically place our ad on the show," said Amanda Borichevsky, a spokesperson for Travelocity in an email to ColorOfChange.org. "We buy ads in bulk and then they are placed somewhat randomly. However, we have now specifically asked that our ads do not appear during this show."

"We reviewed our commercial schedule, and based on your feedback, we've put any programming featuring Glenn Beck on our "do not air" list," said Aziz Mottiwala, Senior Marketing Manager for Allergan, in an email to ColorOfChange.org. "This means that you will no longer see any Restasis ads during programming featuring Glenn Beck. Thanks again for bringing this to our attention."

"Ally advertises on a broad spectrum of programs to reach our potential customers," said a Customer Care Representative for Ally Bank. "Our advertising is not an endorsement of editorial content on any program. We have ceased to advertise on the Glenn Beck program."

In a phone conversation with Dwayne Sigler, Senior Vice President of Marketing for Broadview Security Systems, Sigler told ColorOfChange.org that Broadview's advertising is bought based on network, not particular programs, but that "given the considerations, we have requested of Fox News not to include us in the rotation that would have our commercials running on Glenn Beck's show."

"...We are no longer airing our commercials on the Glenn Beck Show..." said Mary Beth Mayer, spokesperson for Re-Bath, in a phone message to ColorOfChange.org.

Best. Gift. Ever.

Three advertisers drop Glenn Beck over his claim that President Obama is a "racist"

By GottaLaff

Money talks:

ColorOfChange announced today that three advertisers have said that they are dropping Beck:

Three companies who run ads during Glenn Beck — NexisLexis-owned Lawyers.com, Procter & Gamble and Progressive Insurance — today distanced themselves from Beck. LexisNexis has pulled its advertising from Beck and says it has no plans to advertise on the program in the future. Both Procter & Gamble and Progressive Insurance called the Beck advertising placements an error that they would correct.

The decision by the three companies comes as over 45,000 ColorofChange.org members call on advertisers to pull their ads from Glenn Beck after the controversial news host called President Obama a “racist” who “has a deep-seated hatred for white people” on “Fox & Friends” last week.

(HT: MediaMatters)

How about just kicking his hate-filled ass off the Tee Vee Machine? Yeah, that would work.

First UK Ad For The Morning After Pill

The comments at the YouTube link are interesting. Wonder how long before we start seeing these on Oxygen?

Barack Obama, Flavor Of The Week

LOL. Copyranter also noted that the "flag" on the Capitol and Obama's lapel is a little, erm, strange. h/t Ben.

Eat it, Ben & Jerry. Via Russian ad agency Voskhod (named after the spacecrafts), we have a new, racially-flavored print ad for Duet ice cream that may cool relations considerably between our new multi-cultural prez and judoman Vlad Putin...peace signs and rainbows, notwithstanding (image via).

Exactly how bad is the economy?

So bad, that NBC hasn't sold all it's Super Bowl ad time yet. Ow.

A week before Super Bowl XLIII, NBC is still in "active negotiations" to sell its last few commercial spots.

That's why some advertising wags are calling Super Bowl 2009 the Economy Bowl.

This close to game time, it's unusual to have any of the 67 time slots unsold.

The network, which will show next Sunday's game between the Arizona Cardinals and the Pittsburgh Steelers, had no trouble getting takers for its record-high $3 million-per-half-minute spots — before Labor Day.

After that, sales fizzled along with the economy.

More excellence in advertising

Really, this stuff is starting to get to me. Maybe I've watched too much "Mad Men", but who the hell came up with the idea that it would sell cars to show giddy women swooping up shoes that have fallen from the sky into the back of their vehicles. First, shoes falling from the sky? Second, they're not matched! All these women are doing is scooping up raggedy single shoes. I give up.

Deep Thought

Did someone get paid to brainstorm up that what advertising really needed was more John McEnroe?

New Obama Ad- The McCain Gamble

Not as hard as I'd like it to be, but I like the video game aspect of it. What do you think?

New Obama Ad- "Three Times"

Not bad, but I'm still looking for blood.

Why did ad company nix Obama's gas pump campaign?

Der, it's called censorship.

A Barack Obama ad ready to air at Florida gas stations that have pumps topped with TV screens was nixed at the last minute because the advertising company's chief said it reflected poorly on the oil industry, according to the presidential candidate's campaign.

Gas Station TV -- whose slogan is ''It's Always Prime Time at the Pump'' -- was slated to run the 30-second ad for two weeks at pumps in Miami, Tampa and Orlando, according to documentation provided by the Obama campaign.

''The GSTV owners have signed off on this,'' a representative of ABC National Sales wrote in an e-mail.

''But no motorist saw the ad because, as Gas Station TV informed the campaign this afternoon, the company will not run ads that are damaging to oil companies,'' read a statement from the campaign issued Wednesday evening.

The statement, released hours after the Obama camp announced that the ad would begin airing Wednesday, turned what had looked like a major gaffe into a potential public relations victory.

Christians for Obama

By GottaLaff

But.. but... he's one of them Muslims!

A new Christian political action committee backing Democrat Barack Obama in the presidential race is escalating its efforts to elect the Illinois senator with the help of Christian voters this November.

The Matthew 25 Network, named after the Bible verse (“I tell you the truth, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me”) is a consortium of Christian faith leaders and activists working to elect more Democrats to office who share the same “biblical and gospel values,” said Mara Vanderslice, the head of the PAC.

Obama shares... "biblical and gospel values"? Who knew?

Vanderslice said the group intends to spend at least $500,000 in advertising between now and Nov. 4, and the group will focus mainly on Christian radio and Christian publications, such as the National Catholic Reporter and Relevant Magazine.

A new one-minute radio ad will be airing on Christian radio in Ohio, Michigan, and Colorado in the short-term. Vanderslice said they plan to expand the buy to other swing states, including Pennsylvania, Virginia, Missouri, and North Carolina.

[...] The ad underscores Obama’s Christianity.

There shouldn't be a need to underscore his religion, Christian or otherwise.

Obama Asks NBC to Draw Up Olympics Ad Packages

Oh yeah. This is why he gave up public financing.

WASHINGTON (AdAge.com) -- Those tuning in to NBC Sports' Olympics coverage this year will see spots from General Motors, McDonald's, Budweiser, Nike and -- just maybe -- Sen. Barack Obama.

Though the Obama campaign is keeping mum about whether it will definitely run spots, it has asked NBC Universal about Olympics advertising including $500,000, $2 million and $4 million packages of ads. (NBC presented those along with a $10 million package.) It's not only a sign that the Obama camp has faith it can continue its stellar fundraising achievements but a signal that a widening field of battleground states has the candidate contemplating national broadcast buys. An Olympics buy could also allow Mr. Obama to reach out to a large swath of women.