PhotOh! Palin helps "the cause"

By GottaLaff

Nanotyrnns was kind enough to loan this to us:

MeMe McMoneyFirst has her priorities, and they don't include any of us.

Au contraire, on Planet MeMe, Santa Cause brings lots of presents... but only to her.

To quote Shannyn Moore (who knows a thing or two about a thing or two) on Twitter:

Palin CHARGES the teaparty 4 appearances, says she'll donate 2 their candidates, THEN KEEPS THE $$$.

Can't get more "for the people" than that... Also too there.

Why Carly Fiorina will lose the election

By GottaLaff

Other than Carly Fiorina's evil Demon Sheep video that was so bad, so laughable, that it demanded its own DSCC parody; other than being a flop at HP; other than being fired from HP; other than being one of the worst CEOs in America; other than being part of the elite wealthy bonus-laden golden parachuted crowd; other than having been a John McCain (he lost, remember?) surrogate... if all that's not enough...

Sarah Palin, the 2008 Republican nominee for vice president, is making her presence felt in California’s Senate race by backing Carly Fiorina, the former chief executive of Hewlett-Packard. [...]

In a statement, Ms. Palin called Ms. Fiorina “the commonsense conservative that California needs.”

“She’s not a career politician,” added Ms. Palin, the former Alaska governor. “She’s a businesswoman who has run a major corporation. She knows how to really incentivize job creation.”

Endorsa McBadChoice forgot three words: "She's a businesswoman who has failed at running a major corporation."

Endorsa's track record of getting people elected isn't the best. Carly's doomed.

Added bonus! When Carly Van MoneyBags was asked directly whether she thought Endorsa had the experience to run a big company like Hewlett-Packard, she said no. Perhaps Endorsa took that as a compliment.

Double added bonus! McBadChoice refused to endorse fellow Tea Party fan Chuck DeVore.

When will the Tea Baggers figure out that they've been exploited and will be tossed aside like used... tea bags?

Sarah Palin Quote- "Domestic Drilling: Why We Can Still Believe"

By GottaLaff

Polluta McOil$lick has finally admitted she prays to the Oil Gods. She's a believer:

Her ghost writer's Facebook post includes the following:

...Todd, an Alaska Native and trained oil spill responder...

I'm not sure why that sentence struck me as odd, but it did.

Now for the nauseating parts:

We still believe in responsible development, which includes drilling to extract energy sources, because we know that there is an inherent link between energy and security, energy and prosperity, and energy and freedom.

I wonder how secure, energetic, and prosperous Louisiana, Mississippi, and other Gulf states feel now that they have decades of clean-up and regrowth after all that oily, deadly destruction.

We need oil, and if we don’t drill for it here, we have to purchase it from countries that not only do not like America and can use energy purchases as a weapon against us, but also do not have the oversight that America has.

We need clean energy, not finite, dwindling, minimal, insufficient amounts of filthy fossil fuels. And Polluta, you might want to rethink that part about "oversight". Had there been proper oversight, this catastrophe might have been avoided.

Actions will be taken to increase oversight to prevent future accidents.

Too late.

Government can and must play an appropriate role here.

Would that be the same Commie Marxist fascist government you think is too big and too intrusive? So you need them now, do you, Polluta?

It is inexcusable for any oil company to not invest in preventative measures. They must be held accountable or the public will forever distrust the industry.

Too late.

I repeat the slogan “drill here, drill now” not out of naiveté or disregard for the tragic consequences of oil spills [...] I continue to believe in it because increased domestic oil production will make us a more secure, prosperous, and peaceful nation.

It's hard to imagine the affected states feeling very secure, prosperous, or at peace right about now. But now we're just repeating ourselves, aren't we Polluta?

May spill responders be safe.

...and obsolete in the near future, when we start depending on wind and solar energy, not polluting, dirty, wasteful, expensive, intrusive energy sources.

Sorry, Polluta, but I'm not a believer.


UPDATE: I forgot to share these comments from the Facebook page (click to enlarge):

Doonesbury: Sarah Palin Word Salad edition

By GottaLaff

And the Babbles McWTF story arc continues:

(Click on image to enlarge)

VIDEO: BLUNT Voices talk Tea Baggers, Arizona Racial Profiling, Palin

By GottaLaff

Blunt is a lot like letters to the editor. YOUR take, short, to the point.

This is one more way to be heard. We're grassrootsy like that.




For more information about Blunt, follow this link (link won't work until after May 1).

If your video file is too big to email, then go here and use YouSendIt.com.

Please include a name you'd like to use, and a "title", if any, in your e-mail, as you'll see in the video graphics.

Remember: Try to keep the videos at 30 seconds or under.

It's your turn. Go.

Journalists Required to Donate to Anti-Choicers In Order To Cover Palin’s Speech

By GottaLaff


PayMe McBlabFest is making one of her screeches at a fundraiser for the "faith-based" anti-choice group Heroic Media. And the press must pay admission in order to cover the event.

And who exactly is it who is intruding into the lives of U.S. citizens again? Oh, that's right. The "lamestream media" aren't really citizens unless they show their papers, so they have no freedoms. Only PayMe and her clan have them:

[I]n order to cover Palin’s speech, the Austin-American Statesman reports that journalists will have to make a contribution to Heroic Media:

Restrictions: Heroic Media will try to prohibit video and audio recordings of Palin’s appearance, and news organizations wishing to cover her speech must buy a ticket, the proceeds of which will go to Heroic Media.

[...] Earlier this year, after conservatives criticized Palin’s $100,000+ fee to speak at the Tea Party convention, she said she would donate the proceeds to “the cause.” Perhaps that’s what she is trying to get the media to do as well.

I posted about another event to be held on May 12th at which McBlabFest is charging the press:

The high-priced tickets for the May 12th event are still quite plentiful. For the rest of this week, WIND is just giving the tickets away. From 4:00pm-5:00pm, those looking for tickets need only show up at a given Merlin shop each day this week. The first 25 listeners to stop by the Merlin locations each day will receive a free pair of tickets to see Sarah Palin speak in Rosemont and a $30.00 gift certificate to be used towards service at a Merlin 200,000 Mile Shop. [...]

In a related note, by request of Sarah Palin's people, no Chicago press or media members are being easily allowed into the event. Those media outlets who wish to be there, will have to buy the expensive tickets themselves.[

As you can see, at that event, they are giving seats away along with gift certificates. Maybe the media contributions, should there be any, will compensate for the losses. So much for "free press".

If you recall, PayMe also pre-screens questions. I'm beginning to think she has a few control issues.

Meantime, who exactly are these "Heroic" types?

Think Progress:

The group’s Internet strategy tries to direct Google users to an anti-choice website:

Heroic Media utilizes an online strategy to purchase top listings on search engines, such as google, so when teens “google” the word “abortion,”… “I think I’m pregnant,” … or “terminate pregnancy,” one of the top web sites they’ll see is our partner web site http://www.teenbreaks.com

Teenbreaks.com provides information about abortion, communicating with parents, adoption, cutting and more.

Oh, it gets worse. Follow the Think Progress link. And when you get there, they won't even charge you.

Quickie: Woman Who Beat Sarah Palin Enters Politics

By GottaLaff






Today's Quickie:

The woman who beat Sarah Palin for the beauty queen title of Miss Alaska in 1984 is running for the Georgia state legislature, according to the Atlanta Journal Constitution.


Blackburn’s entrance is a happy development for Democrats. The 34th District has some rapidly shifting demographics.

Maryline Blackburn voted for Obama in 2008... and didn't quit in the middle of her Miss Alaska reign. That's two reasons to vote for her in 2010.

That was today's Quickie. Was it good for you?

VIDEO: Sarah Palin accidentally slams Fox with "lamestream media" label

By GottaLaff

Thank you profusely, Heather (at Crooks and Liars) for this tasty morsel:



Oh, this is too delicious.Who else could be as blatantly idiotic as OpenWide McFootInMouth?

This was one of her biggest ClusterFoxes ever:


OpenWide finally got something right: Faux is synonymous with "lamestream media".

Hey ClusterFoxers, how does it feel to get blasted by your favorite new spokesDeeJay?

Doonesbury: No One Likes You, Sarah Palin edition

By GottaLaff

I'm loving this story arc:

(click on image to enlarge)

Now they're giving Palin tickets away!

By GottaLaff

First the Tea Patriot event ticket prices were cut in half, now they cost nothing. Zero. Zilch. Maybe OverPaid McFreebie needs a ghost speaker.

Via Chicago Media and Radio:

This may not come as a surprise to some, but the upcoming WIND-AM event with Sarah Palin speaking is not selling very well. The high-priced tickets for the May 12th event are still quite plentiful. For the rest of this week, WIND is just giving the tickets away. From 4:00pm-5:00pm, those looking for tickets need only show up at a given Merlin shop each day this week. The first 25 listeners to stop by the Merlin locations each day will receive a free pair of tickets to see Sarah Palin speak in Rosemont and a $30.00 gift certificate to be used towards service at a Merlin 200,000 Mile Shop. The special Merlin locations for the rest of this week are:

Tuesday: 8504 S. Harlem Ave., Bridgeview, IL
Wednesday: 234 West Roosevelt Rd, Lombard, IL
Thursday: 400 Dundee Rd, Elgin, IL
Friday: 1911 S. Arlington Heights Rd, Arlington Heights, IL

In a related note, by request of Sarah Palin's people, no Chicago press or media members are being easily allowed into the event. Those media outlets who wish to be there, will have to buy the expensive tickets themselves.

The desperation is palpable. The media must pop for their own pricey tickets, and the audience has to be enticed with free seats and gift certificates. Gee, that's not embarrassing at all.

As for giving away freebies, sounds a little like... socialism!

I'm willing to bet she still won't be able to fill the house.

H/t: Windy City Watch

Sarah Palin's newest ghost writer on Facebook

By GottaLaff

Illiterata McKidScrawl got someone brand new to post for her on her Facebook blog! To see how bright and shiny and defensive he is, follow this link:

Let this latest dismissed complaint serve as a reminder for one of the real—and stated—reasons for her voluntary relinquishment of office, an office she campaigned for diligently, tirelessly and effectively. It stands as a marker that occasionally, every so often, there are public servants who can recognize the difference between self-interest and public interest. Sarah Palin is one such public servant.

- Thomas Van Flein, personal attorney for Sarah Palin

Yes, she is. Illiterata can tell the difference, and chose the former.

Sarah Palin Tea Patriot event tickets are not selling, even at 50% off

By GottaLaff

Do I sense just a touch of desperation in this here e-mail?

Because of our close partnership with WIND, members of the Chicago Tea Patriots have been offered a special ticket price of 50% off all remaining tickets.

In order to take advantage of this special ticket pricing, please go to www.Ticketmaster.com or call 800-745-3000 and use the code word: WIND.

Additional information about "An Evening with Sarah Palin" can be found at www.560WIND.com

Buses will be chartered and leave from the Mt. Greenwood/Oak Lawn and Midway Airport areas. Please let me know, if you would like to take the bus.

And if you do attend, make sure you stop by and say hi to the Chicago Tea Patriots, who will be teaming up with Adam Andrzjewski of Open the Books and David Smith of the Illinois Family Institute -- a trio of conservatives.

Feel free to contact me with questions or concerns.

I'm real excited and look forward to seeing you.

God bless,

Catherina Wojtowicz,
Chicago Tea Patriots
312-xxxxxxx
www.ChicagoTeaPatriots.com
ChicagoTeaPatriots@Gmail.com

The event I RSVP'ed to, to get on the e-mail list can be found [here] at: http://www.facebook.com/#!/event.php?eid=121079247907868

WIND Radio - home to Glenn Beck - is hosting Governor Sarah Palin Wednesday, May 12th, 7 p.m., at the Rosemont Theatre.

Tickets and info can be found at www.560WIND.com

The Chicago Tea Patriots will have buses to take those interested to the Rosemont Theatre. Please contact me for details. Buses will collect passengers in the Mt. Greenwood/Oak Lawn and Midway Airport areas.

The Chicago Tea Patriots, along with Adam Andrzejewski and the Illinois Family Institute, will be sponsoring a table at the event, so please stop by to say hi! Chicago Tea Patriot tee shirts will be on sale at the event, too!

This is going to a great evening for conservatives to spend together celebrate the approaching elections!

If you would like to reserve a seat on the bus, please let me know.

Catherina Wojtowicz,
312-xxxxxxx
Chicago Tea Patriots
www.ChicagoTeaPatriots.com

I toddled on over to the Facebook page, and look what I found:

For any other information, you need to phone me. Send me a note or call me, and if I feel comfortable with you, I will give you further details on the bus and other issues.

Otherwsise, you are on your own. Sorry but, I've received too many hate calls.

Yikes.

Well, at least with tickets going for a big 50% discount, there was an uptick in sales, right? Who could not afford an opportunity to listen to the wisdom of Half-Gov McHalf-Off?

(click on image to enlarge)

Oops. Never mind.

Oh, and just by the way, per my source, Catherina Wojtowicz, is the same lady who led the tea baggers in harassing Midge Hough at the Dan Lipinksi town hall.

Doonesbury: Sarah Palin Action Doll's Tea Party edition

By GottaLaff

Kool-Aid, Tea, what's the difference...

(click on image to enlarge)

Tuh-weet! Palin lectures media on credibility

By GottaLaff

Who better than BaldFace McSpewLies to lecture the media on credibility:


The media expert has spoken. In fact, Half-Gov McHypocrite never stopped speaking, ever. Oh, except when the media asked her to, repeatedly, during Election 2008.

Hey LameScream McEthicless: Want 2 earn some credibility? U hammered the "lame stream" media 4 doing their job in '08, but ignored them when they revealed you to be a complete nitwit. Change that.

H/t: EmeraldKnight76

Doonesbury: Sarah Palin Action Doll at Tea Party edition

By GottaLaff

I feel a snarkalicious story arc coming on:

(click on image to enlarge)

Did Sarah Palin commit perjury during her testimony in the David Kernell trial?

By GottaLaff

Sarah Palin outside court house in Knoxville

I get emails from time to time from our pals over at Palingates, inviting me to read about their latest discoveries. They do a great job of digging up evidence that calls into question the many versions of events that Barbie McLipSchmutz passes along to the accommodating media.

They also uncover emails galore, long lost press accounts, statements, videos, you name it.

Their most recent investigation involves the email hacking trial of David Kernell at which Barbie gave testimony:

Did Sarah Palin commit perjury while giving her testimony in Knoxville? We have to put this as a question, because we don't know the exact wording of all she said and have to rely on news reports for our information.

However, there are strong indications that Palin purposely lied during her testimony.

Palingates then goes on to reveal the contents of several emails as well as conflicting quotes regarding Todd, Trig, and Bristol, and much more.

Summary:

If we look at Sarah's statements from an objective point of view, provided that the reporting in the news was correct, I strongly believe that many prosecutors would choose "GUILTY". However, this is Sarah Palin we are talking about, the woman who gets away with virtually anything. For how long still? Only God knows!

However, we won't forget Sarah's immortal words:

"I do think there should be consequences for bad behavior."

Please read all about it here.

Inevitable: Levi Johnston Writing Book on Palin

By GottaLaff

Levi Johnston has a story to tell. You know that, I know that, everyone knows that. The question is, what will he say, will what he says be credible, and when will he say it?

According to Levi, he will tell the "true story of the Palin household."

A brief excerpt from Mike Allen: "Sarah Palin is a singular national industry... This January, she signed a three-year contributor deal with Fox News worth $1 million a year, according to people familiar with the deal... Nowadays, for both poles of the political spectrum but especially for the right, politics is a business -- the entertainment business... It was Fox's Roger Ailes who had the insight that the American right was an underserved market, one with a powerful kind of brand loyalty."

Now Levi hopes to profit off of McLipSchmutz Inc.

Levi:

“When she lost, I knew exactly what she was gonna do,” he says. “The whole time she was getting big-money offers for book and TV shows. I was like, All right, she’s gonna pick that up. It was just a matter of time before she quit."

As for politics being a business, the unfortunate extension of that is that news has become infotainment. Punditiocy has replaced solid reporting, commercialism has replaced, well, just about everything... which is so Foxed up.

(via)

Sarah Palin: Glenn Beck's "chalkboard technique changing our country"

By GottaLaff

Babbles McPreScreen has a few pre-existing conditions, only hers have nothing to do with her health. Well, maybe her mental health.

No, this is all about Bush envy and controlling the media. Bendy straws were a prerequisite for he university keynote screeching, and pre-screening questions was a must for her latest little Q and A fest.

She has clearly run out of hands to write on, realizes that risky, off the cuff word salad won't cut it, and is now doing her level best to fill Boy Georgie's teensy weensy inept little media-restricting shoes.

Welcome to liberal-leaning Eugene, Oregon, Babbles:

"It's the belief that the government who governs least governs best," she said.

That should win 'em right over. Try again. This time be more convincing:

“I eat granola,” Palin said. “I just happen to shoot and catch my organic food before I eat it.”

“Here I am in Track Town USA and my kid’s name is Track. How Eugene hippie can that be?” she added.

Thud.

Then she dissed "Obamacare." Way to win a more progressive crowd over, Ace. Okay, there's still hope. Maybe she could make it up to them by throwing them an environment bone:

She also called for drilling in the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge and addressed head-on environmentalists against her plan. She argued America has more stringent environmental restrictions than many of the foreign governments we currently rely on for oil.

“So environmentalists are kind of hypocritical on this one,” she said. “I don’t know how environmentalists can sleep at night.”

Ooooo, wrong answer.

There's still time for her to make it up to them, though. I'm sure Babbles will toss them a bone or two. Who would be so stupid and tone deaf that they would refuse to dish up one measly little overture?

Palin accused the media of being inextricably linked to the political left.

“Sometimes they are kind of one in the same,” she said. “We call them the 'lame-stream' media lately.”

See, that's not what I meant. Okay, one more shot. Try again, Babbles. Offer that paying crowd of yours a crumb or two.

She said the media has been unfair to the tea party movement, going so far as to say they make up lies about tea party supporters.

No, no! You're not getting this at all!

“The left, well, they had to grab hold of something to discredit,” she said. “The press then just started making things up. I’ve had to deal with that for quite some time now.”

Deep breath.

She must have one redeeming quality, just one. Maybe she'll have a moment of spontaneity during which we'll discover something good and kind and reasonable and....

During a question and answer session, Eugene City Councilwoman Jennifer Solomon read a pre-screened question from the audience about her role at Fox News. Palin said she was proud to be a part of Fox News for being “fair and balanced.”

Never mind.

She also praised Fox host Glenn Beck and said with “his chalkboard technique he’s changing our country."

And if all that isn't bad enough, journalists were not allowed to use cameras or any other kind of recording device. They were only allowed to watch her speak [sic] on a live video feed... from another room.

One-- count 'em, one-- photo--taken by a hired photographer-- was given out. One.

All this and less could be had for $250 a pop. Yep, 800 people paid that much. And some of them had to settle for a video feed from a separate room at... $100. Yes, they paid a hundred bucks to watch her on TV.

To add insult to injury, 70 people shelled out a thousand smackeroos for a photo op with her. But, hey, that included a copy of her book.

Glenn Beck would be proud.

H/t: Palingate

VIDEO: Sarah Palin Meets the Press after Testifying in Hacking Trial

By GottaLaff



Wordy McMilkIt even took advantage of this moment to play the Trig card... again... or as Wordy would say:

PeopleexploitmykidsbutIwouldneverdothatI'maRAGINGHYPOCRITE!
Let'stalkaboutBristolwhilewe'reatit.IllegalprivateexposenotrightWORDSALAD
Isthismygoodside?ThiswassohurtfulWEAREVICTIMSPlayvictimcardoften.
NOBREATH.
Itwassnowin'athome!
I'lljustkeeptalkingtogarnersympathyandattention.Youguysalwaysfallforthat.
Memememememememememememememememeeeeeeee!

A little background:

During the 2008 campaign, David Kernell, then a college student, thought it might be fun to hack into Sarah Palin's email account and publish her private information on the web.

VIDEO: Joe Biden compliments Sarah Palin, talks "F-Bomb" slip on "The View"

By GottaLaff

Vice President Biden, discussing Barbie McLipSchmutz:

"She is a charming person. It's hard not to like her."

Not for many of us, Joe, but it's hard not to like you:



And here he is commenting on the (in)famous "F- Bomb" slip to Obama over the health care bill.:



Now had he dropped the F-Bomb while debating Barbie...