Sarah Palin: Glenn Beck's "chalkboard technique changing our country"

By GottaLaff

Babbles McPreScreen has a few pre-existing conditions, only hers have nothing to do with her health. Well, maybe her mental health.

No, this is all about Bush envy and controlling the media. Bendy straws were a prerequisite for he university keynote screeching, and pre-screening questions was a must for her latest little Q and A fest.

She has clearly run out of hands to write on, realizes that risky, off the cuff word salad won't cut it, and is now doing her level best to fill Boy Georgie's teensy weensy inept little media-restricting shoes.

Welcome to liberal-leaning Eugene, Oregon, Babbles:

"It's the belief that the government who governs least governs best," she said.

That should win 'em right over. Try again. This time be more convincing:

“I eat granola,” Palin said. “I just happen to shoot and catch my organic food before I eat it.”

“Here I am in Track Town USA and my kid’s name is Track. How Eugene hippie can that be?” she added.

Thud.

Then she dissed "Obamacare." Way to win a more progressive crowd over, Ace. Okay, there's still hope. Maybe she could make it up to them by throwing them an environment bone:

She also called for drilling in the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge and addressed head-on environmentalists against her plan. She argued America has more stringent environmental restrictions than many of the foreign governments we currently rely on for oil.

“So environmentalists are kind of hypocritical on this one,” she said. “I don’t know how environmentalists can sleep at night.”

Ooooo, wrong answer.

There's still time for her to make it up to them, though. I'm sure Babbles will toss them a bone or two. Who would be so stupid and tone deaf that they would refuse to dish up one measly little overture?

Palin accused the media of being inextricably linked to the political left.

“Sometimes they are kind of one in the same,” she said. “We call them the 'lame-stream' media lately.”

See, that's not what I meant. Okay, one more shot. Try again, Babbles. Offer that paying crowd of yours a crumb or two.

She said the media has been unfair to the tea party movement, going so far as to say they make up lies about tea party supporters.

No, no! You're not getting this at all!

“The left, well, they had to grab hold of something to discredit,” she said. “The press then just started making things up. I’ve had to deal with that for quite some time now.”

Deep breath.

She must have one redeeming quality, just one. Maybe she'll have a moment of spontaneity during which we'll discover something good and kind and reasonable and....

During a question and answer session, Eugene City Councilwoman Jennifer Solomon read a pre-screened question from the audience about her role at Fox News. Palin said she was proud to be a part of Fox News for being “fair and balanced.”

Never mind.

She also praised Fox host Glenn Beck and said with “his chalkboard technique he’s changing our country."

And if all that isn't bad enough, journalists were not allowed to use cameras or any other kind of recording device. They were only allowed to watch her speak [sic] on a live video feed... from another room.

One-- count 'em, one-- photo--taken by a hired photographer-- was given out. One.

All this and less could be had for $250 a pop. Yep, 800 people paid that much. And some of them had to settle for a video feed from a separate room at... $100. Yes, they paid a hundred bucks to watch her on TV.

To add insult to injury, 70 people shelled out a thousand smackeroos for a photo op with her. But, hey, that included a copy of her book.

Glenn Beck would be proud.

H/t: Palingate

Iranian Traffic Engineering: The Chart

By GottaLaff

Via The Motley Moose:

Arbor Networks provides a good view on Iran's connection to the Internet via the Internet Observatory. The fat healthy traffic to the left of the dropoff is what Iranian Internet traffic looks like at normal times, the cliff denotes the election and to the right of that you see traffic increasingly "leaking" past the imposed restrictions.

A chart is worth a thousand words.

Obama to abolish limits on U.S.-Cuba family ties

By GottaLaff

Que bueno:

In a move that could herald better ties between Cold War foes, the Obama administration is planning to abolish limits on family travel and cash remittances between the United States and Cuba, the Wall Street Journal reported on Friday.

President Barack Obama has decided to fulfill a campaign promise and allow Cuban Americans and Cuban emigres to freely visit and send money to their families in the communist-led nation, the newspaper said, citing a senior administration official.

A White House official confirmed the administration's intentions to lift the restrictions, but said the measure was not a new policy statement and was not imminent. [...]

The removal of limits on family travel and cash remittances would allow Cubans living in the United States to travel freely to the island, instead of once a year as at present. It would also remove the ceiling of $1,200 per person in cash remittances to needy family members in Cuba.

"This is a good humanitarian move that honors Cuban Americans' right to visit and aid their relatives as they see fit," said Cuba expert Phil Peters of the Lexington Institute.

"But it creates one class of Americans who can travel to Cuba at will, so it will add to the momentum in Congress to lift restrictions on all other Americans, who have a right to travel too," he said.

The Wall Street Journal said the move was probably meant to signal a new attitude toward both Cuba and other Latin American countries that have pressed Washington to end a trade embargo that has sought to isolate Havana for more than four decades.

Strollers, umbrellas forbidden at Obama inauguration

By GottaLaff

If you're off to see the inauguration, hope for clear skies, leave your baby at home, and wear something with lots of pockets:

Strollers, umbrellas and backpacks are to be banned from parts of the US capital for president-elect Barack Obama's historical inauguration January 20, planners warned on Sunday.

In fact, don't even think about eating or drinking anything perishable:

Due to strict security precautions, those attending the inaugural parade or hoping for a spot on the grounds near the Capitol building in Washington have been told to leave their previsions at home, including duffel bags and coolers.

Whatever you do, avoid creative expression:

Posters and signs are also banned.

Another word of advice: Wear comfortable shoes:

"A vast majority of attendees will be in standing room sections and should be prepared to be on their feet for several hours," according to a congressional committee tasked with planning the swearing-in ceremony for Obama and vice president-elect Joe Biden.

But don't worry, you'll be snug as a bug in a rug:

But officials say they plan to provide blankets and thousands of ponchos if it rains or temperatures drop.

They have made arrangements to set up nearly 30,000 chairs, mostly on and around the grounds of the west side of the US Capitol, where the oath of office is administered on the Capitol steps.

And all those Colt .45s and daggers you planned on stashing discreetly in your forbidden Victoria's Secret shopping bag? Fuggetaboutit:

Other prohibited items include large bags or packages, as well as firearms, explosives and sharp objects.

Plan on celebrating? Do not BYOB:

Alcohol is also forbidden on the grounds. But bars, restaurants and nightclubs can serve alcohol until 4:00 am -- two hours later than usual -- and food 24 hours a day from January 17 to 21.

Let's recap: No strollers, umbrellas, backpacks, duffel bags, satchels, coolers, ByeBye Bush banners, posters, signs, uncomfortable trendy footwear, bags, parcels, pistols, rifles, Derringers, lean-tos, box cars, bayonets, daggers, needles, Barbie Dream Houses, chopsticks, T.N.T., plastic explosives, H-bombs, letter openers, box cutters, Swiss Army knives, shotguns (are you listening, Grandma Palin?), cement mixers, crates, Projectile Bush Shoes shoe boxes, doghouses, suitcases, ice buckets, Chablis, Chateau Neuf de Papes, Budweisers (are you listening, Cindy McCain?), ales, lagers, Coronas, Margaritas, Cognacs, Jack Daniels, Absoluts, Absinthes, sakes, or creature comforts of any kind.

Now go have yourselves a good time!