AUDIO: Laffy on the Radio with Karl Knox, Montreal

By GottaLaff

Here's the show I did the other day on a Montreal AM station with Karl Knox. He was terrific, and easy to talk to both on and off the air. He's invited me back!

It runs about a half an hour, so grab a cup, or bottle, of something and enjoy the really bad phone reception between California and Canada:

Chart- Health care spending: U.S. v. Abroad

By GottaLaff

Tech issues fixed... Now, take a gander at this:

(click on image to enlarge)

H/t: Jdkidd81

VIDEO: Ann Coulter prepares human-rights complaint

By GottaLaff

Yesterday I posted about Ann Coulter's speech being canceled out of concerns for public safety (hers or theirs?). The Madam's Apple would have none of that.

It might have been more interesting had the University of Ottawa just let her shoot her mouth off and then had her arrested, but now we have a new wrinkle:

Right-wing firebrand Ann Coulter, who cancelled her speech to the University of Ottawa Tuesday night over fears for her safety, says she’s the victim of a hate crime under Canadian laws.

She said she’s hired Canadian conservative activist Ezra Levant to prepare a human-rights complaint that will test how equitably these hate-crime laws are applied.

Although one does have to qualify as human first, one would think. And when it comes to hate, well, I suppose we have to admit, she is an expert.

In an interview with The Globe, Ms. Coulter suggested the University of Ottawa’s provost, Francois Houle, is partly responsible for the angry crowds that opposed her speaking Tuesday night. He is the official who warned her in advance to watch what she said lest she incur criminal charges for hate speech.

The Madam had a few choice comments to make, as she's wont to do:

“I would like to know if any Muslim has been treated this badly, at least since the Reformation, because I am drawing a blank” [...]

“You guys used to be so cool. You were smokers. You had epic hockey fights. We had half our comedians from Canada. Now you’re all a bunch of girls named Francois.”

That ought to win over a few Canadian and Muslim hearts and minds.

Gosh, Ann, you're right as usual. Muslims have been treated like kings and queens. They have been put on pedestals and revered. They are never, ever treated "this badly".

By the way, the feminine, aka "girl" version is Francoise.

Via a comment from one of our Canadian readers:

Here in Canada, we do not justify hate speech in the name of freedom. When we pay thousands of tuition to our public institution, we expect them to uphold the law of the country and foster an environment that does not encourage empty headed bigots like Coulter, albeit an entertaining one. This is the same woman who stated on national tv Jews need to be perfected by accepting Christ into their life. Talk about fascistic believe in the name of religion.

Now, when America can send us a conservative with a political and intellectual discourse beyond the dark ages of Christian v. Muslim enemy dogma, we might let one speak in our universities.

Inciting hate and encouraging disenfranchising is her specialty. However, it's also worth noting that she has faded into the background some since Sarah Palin and the Tea Tantrumers started monopolizing the airwaves.

Extremism and vitriol have been amplified of late. That kind of freedom of speech is stirring up debate, which is the silver lining. It sure beats sweeping it under the carpet.

H/t: Ursula (who lives in Canada)

VIDEO: Let's all move to Canada... Plus bonus Sarah Palin lie #57473734!

By GottaLaff

The whole video by my Twitter pals Lester and Charlie (aka bondwooley) had me laughing, but the real fun starts at about 1:38:



Let's all move to Canada.

Meantime, Gryphen caught Doozy McBaldFace in yet another fib:

In the above link Palin claims that while living in Skagway her brother was burned and they took him to the town of Whitehorse, in Canada, for treatment. However in an article written in the Skagway News around May 0f 2007 (Using the guilty plea of the VECO executives as a reference point), Palin tells a completely story: Her brother burned his foot badly jumping through a fire, and her mother had to take him down to Juneau on the ferry to the hospital.

Well gee which story is true? Did brother Chuck get medical treatment in Juneau or Whitehorse? Or are we to believe Chuck was terribly accident prone and needed to be treated for burns multiple times, in a variety of locations?

Tsk tsk tsk. Doozy must have forgotten to jot down those oh-so-essential hand notes.

Big beer bet for Obama, Harper on Olympic hockey

Both damn good beers.

WASHINGTON — Something is brewing in U.S.-Canada relations. And it's on Olympic ice.

President Barack Obama is betting a case of beer with the Canadian prime minister on the outcome of Sunday's U.S.-Canada gold medal game.

White House spokesman Robert Gibbs said President Barack Obama had a case of Yuengling, a Pennsylvania regional brew, riding on the game. Prime Minister Stephen Harper is wagering 24 bottles of Molson. The beer battle pits Canada's oldest brewery against the oldest beer maker in the United States. Molson Canada is now a subsidiary of Molson Coors Brewing Co., a marriage of Molson and Denver-based Coors.

There was no word on where the cross-border exchange would occur.

UPDATE- President Obama better pack that beer up good, long trip. Canada wins 3-2 in overtime.

PhotOh! Canada: "At least we have health care"

By GottaLaff

After Canada's loss to the USA on Sunday, someone snapped this painful reminder of what we so badly need here, and what our neighbors to the north already have.

This picture was not taken by the reader who linked me (dawgs529), so he says he cannot verify its authenticity.

BREAKING: Biden's Motorcade Involved in accident

By GottaLaff

Via a Fox news alert e-mail:

Vice President Biden's motorcade involved in Vancouver accident injuring two.

Read More:
http://email.foxnews.com/t?ctl=3856:EE6FF5DC23A8E04B00427393AEBC264C&

Details to come.

UPDATE:

Two members of the delegation, Peggy Fleming and Vonetta Flowers, received minor injuries and were taken to a local hospital as a precaution, Jay Carney, communications director for the vice president said in a statement.

Nobody else was hurt, including the veep. The two with minor injuries were released.

Video- Bidens at Olympic opening ceremony

Audio- Canadian politician gives rival the finger, offers to "go outside" with the entire legislature

Man, I want some politicians like this. Totally safe for work except the anger in his voice may scare people off. Via Boing Boing-

Mid Day Distraction

Oh those Canadians!

Sarah Palin is booted from speech at a Canadian hospital

By GottaLaff



We knew this was coming, did we not? Barbie McLipSchmutz was scheduled to speak at a socialist-- er, public-- abortion-providing, advanced directive-servicing (gasp! death panels!) hospital. But that wasn't going to stop her, nosirreebob! Not when there was $200K at stake!

Let's get real. There was no way one of the two wouldn't eventually quit the other:

Now, the Toronto Sun reports that Palin has “been given the boot” and will no longer appear at the fundraiser for St. Peter’s hospital. Jeff Valletine, the vice president of communications for Hamilton Health Sciences, said that he had received a backlash for inviting Palin.

No more $200 grand? That explains her recycled Hawaiian resort wardrobe. No wonder she quit that trip, too. Also.

Canadian drugs a possibility after all?

By GottaLaff

Bob Cesca brings us this glimmer. I'll tease, you pop over to Bob's house:

Susie Madrak has some great news on the Canadian reimportation issue -- directly from the White House.

What's that strange new feeling? Are the corners of my mouth starting to turn upwards?

Sarah Palin to Speak at a Socialist Canadian Hospital

By GottaLaff



This is quite the big deal for someone who said that Canada should really think about reforming its health care system (video from post above), and who's not the biggest fan of abortion rights, and who thinks "death panels" will kill your Grandma. Me oh my.

Hyp. O. Crite:

According to the Hamilton Spectator, Sarah Palin has been contracted to speak at a fundraiser for the Juravinski Cancer Centre and St. Peter’s Hospital in Canada.

Oopsie daisy there, Barbie McLipSchmutz, I do believe you're exposing yourself to the dreaded H1Socialism1:

– St. Peter’s Hospital is a public hospital within the national Canadian healthcare system. In Palin’s worldview, universal, government-insured health care is “socialism.”

– St. Peter’s Hospital performs abortions. Palin, a staunch anti-choice zealot, has protested outside of abortion clinics and has refused to denounce abortion clinic bombers as terrorists.

– St. Peter’s Hospital, through its Centre for Studies in Aging, offers “advanced directives.” Palin tried to derail health reform earlier this year by falsely labeling advanced directive reimbursements as “death panels.”

Oh dear. This will never do.

I feel a "quit" coming on....

As Barbie said, "Keep the faith".

Break-ins reported at another climate research center

By GottaLaff

Watergate redux.

To hell with the health and well-being of, you know, Planet Earth and its world population, our children, grandchildren, great grandchildren, etc. It's much more important to fatten up bank accounts, make headlines, and pull off as many perverse power plays as possible:

As the United States — led by President Barack Obama — prepares to join the world in the fight against global warming, the opponents of reform are resorting to criminal desperation, harkening back to the amoral extremes of Richard Nixon. The release of the hacked emails from CRU was praised as the act of a “whistleblower” by conservatives. “The timing couldn’t be better,” chortled Sen. Jim Inhofe (R-OK). The original Watergate scandal began when right-wing operatives burglarized the offices of their political opponents during a presidential election. “Climategate” is turning out to be worse — now the criminals are turning on scientists as the world burns.

Read the story about the break-in at the Canadian Centre for Climate Modelling and Analysis at the University of Victoria in British Columbia here.

Sometimes it feels like much of the world needs a gigantic straight jacket.

Pentagon thought Canada spied on us via Canadian coins

By GottaLaff

Note: I have made corrections and amended the title. Thank you to those who caught my mistake.

Yes, it's true, according to an e-mail, the Pentagon thought Canada had implanted radio transmitting devices into coins in order to spy on the U.S. of A.

Espionage warnings from the Defence Department caused an international sensation a few years ago over reports of mysterious coins with radio frequency transmitters, until they were debunked. The culprit turned out to be a commemorative quarter in Canada.

But at the height of the mystery, senior Pentagon officials speculated whether Canadians were involved in the spy caper, according to emails marked "Secret/NoForn" and obtained this week by The Associated Press under the U.S. Freedom of Information Act.

No, not Canada! Not our BFF! 'Kay, we would so break up with them over that.

Not that we'd ever really, really doubt the Canadians, right?

"I don't think it is an issue of the Canadians being the bad guys," the Pentagon's counterintelligence chief wrote, "but then again, who knows."

What? Wait. "Who knows"? "Who knows"?? Eeks! Dude! That's even more uncool than some famous celebrity athlete guy cheating on his wife and leaving incriminating voice mails!

Canada is among the closest of U.S. allies, its continental northern neighbour and the leading oil supplier for the U.S. The intelligence services of the two countries are extraordinarily tight and routinely share sensitive secrets.

Oh em gee, I so know! We totally confide in each other at, like, every meet-up, and that whole oil thing is, like, amazing! This whole double ultra superdupersecret spy coin thingy is so bogus. I mean, I am so seriously serious.

In sensational warnings that circulated publicly in late 2006 and early 2007, the Pentagon's Defence Security Service said coins with radio transmitters were found planted on U.S. army contractors with classified security clearances on at least three occasions between October 2005 and January 2006 as the contractors travelled through Canada.

No way. Like, I mean, that was during the BushCo years! OMG, were the contractors, like, Blackwater dudes? Come on, tell! Isweartogod I can keep a secret.

In January 2007, the government abruptly reversed itself and said the warnings were not true.

'K good, cuz that would have so been a major deal breaker and there is like, no way we coulda stayed together.

What suspicious contractors believed to be "nanotechnology" on the coins actually was a protective coating the Royal Canadian Mint applied to prevent the poppy's red colour from rubbing off. The mint produced nearly 30 million such quarters in 2004 commemorating Canada's 117,000 war dead.

This is totally humiliating. I want. To. Die. No, seriously, totally, I mean it. I hope we can still be BFF. Pleeeeze? It will never EVER happen again. Sweartogodandeverythingprecious.

Many of the emails were censored over what the Pentagon said was national security and personal privacy.

Kewl. Cuz, I mean, if anyone saw those, we'd be so grounded and laffed off Facebook and the world stage.

Serious.

H/t: Tymlee

VIDEO: Canadian satirist kicked out of Palin book signing gets Palin to respond

By GottaLaff

Yesterday I posted this, and today we have the video:

In Canada there's a show produced by CBC (Canadian Broadcasting Corp) which is a political satire show. One if its characters is "a showy woman with lotsa lipstick" who goes by the name "Marg Delahunty".

She went on to say that, apparently "Marg" wangled her way into a Barbie McLipSchmutz book signing...

And then she got kicked out. But she did manage to eke a ridiculous answer out of Barbie McLipSchmutz.



I love seeing these stories come to life after I've pictured them in my little pea brain. This was even better than I had imagined.

Canadian satirist gets kicked out of Palin book signing, told Canada should 'dismantle' public healthcare

By GottaLaff

One of our Commenters, Andrea, linked me to this story and provided the back story:

In Canada there's a show produced by CBC (Canadian Broadcasting Corp) which is a political satire show. One if its characters is "a showy woman with lotsa lipstick" who goes by the name "Marg Delahunty".

She went on to say that, apparently "Marg" wangled her way into a Barbie McLipSchmutz book signing . Here's what happened:

Comedian Mary Walsh’s beloved character button-holed the former Alaska governor at a recent book-signing in Columbus, Ohio, only to be strong-armed away from Palin by a cabal of security guards. [...]

“We told her we’re from Canada, and we’re just looking for a few words of encouragement for the Canadian conservatives who have worked so tirelessly to destroy the socialized medicare that we have,” Walsh recalled Tuesday from St. John’s.

“Four huge big burly guys started pushing, and I pushed back, but I got her attention, and she told us to keep the faith, something like that, and said we’re all trying for the same thing.”

So Walsh and company got booted out, but they waited near Barbie's bus until she left the book store. Then Walsh yelled out:

“Hey, remember us, we’re the Canadians! We came all the way here from Canada!” Delahunty yelled. “When we asked you that question, we didn’t hear your answer.”

Here's what Barbie said. Brace yourselves, it's classic Palin:

“Canada needs to dismantle its public health-care system and allow private enterprise to get involved and turn a profit.”

“Basically, she said government should stop doing the work that private enterprise should do,” Walsh said.

Walsh thought it was strange that Palin fans were not allowed to ask her any questions at the signing. Apparently Walsh wasn't around for Election 2008.

“We’re in a bookstore, at a public event, in a place one would think was a bastion of free speech. And no one was allowed to ask questions. What are they afraid of?”

The answer is obvious: Someone would record/jot down/remember the disastrous answers. See: Interview, every.

Canadians are so naive sometimes. Wink.

"Right-wing women rock", lefties have "hairy legs"

By GottaLaff

A so-called columnist at the Calgary Sun has a remarkably sexist thing or two to say about right wing v. left wing women. I'd forgotten people like this existed in the 21st century:

The recent election of Danielle Smith as leader of the Wildrose Alliance reminded me that among the many things I love about the libertarian/right wing are the women.

Could be our slogan: Come for the culture war ... stay for the chicks.

Right-wing women rock.

"Stay for the chicks." No, that's not anachronistic at all. If this column isn't tongue-in-cheek, then Ian Robinson has RDD: Severe respect deficit disorder.

Not for us the sturdy, honest calves of the New Democrat/Green Party female, honed on eco-tourist rainforest hikes.

Those legs are often on unfortunate display, extending from a knee-length tweed skirt as hairy as the legs themselves, and end in a pair of Birkenstocks.

Apprently, all that excessive nose hair ego is interfering with what's left of his mind.

The only sensible footwear you'll find in a right-wing woman's closet are the Nike cross-trainers that go with her gym membership.

Everything else has a three-inch heel. Minimum.

What is up with conservatives and their fetishes? I wonder if Ian's into diapers, too.

Basically, the world economy depends on right-wing women buying shoes.

The world economy? Really? That's some mess-o'-new shoes! What are those high-heeled wingiewomen tromping around on, cut glass?

A right-wing woman wants to get elected, she runs for office.

If she wins, great. If she loses ... well, there's always more shoe shopping.

Campaign slogan: Elect right-wing women! They're not only losers, they're barefoot losers with way too much time on their hands!

A right-wing woman hits the gym, swings past Sobey's and has dinner on the table by the time you get home ... while her left-wing counterpart is still stuck in traffic listening to Sarah McLachlan on her iPod and feeling morally superior about her carrot choices.

And when that plate of food is put in front of you by the right-wing hottie you had the good sense to marry, it will be 100% tofu-free. If you're lucky, she just remembered to buy steak and forgot about the carrot entirely.

There's a lot more, but let me leave you and your impending headache with this sagacious little nugget:

And in case you're not convinced, to indicate the utter superiority of the right-wing woman over the left-wing variant ... just turn on The View.

The left has Joy Behar and Whoopi Goldberg.

We've got Elisabeth Hasselbeck.

Checkmate.

So that's his idea of scoring a big win (odd juxtaposition of Hasselbeck and a game she'd mistake for a collection of salt and pepper shakers). He should stick to checkers.

H/t: Pete

Shoes fly as Bush tells audience, ‘I did not sell my soul’

By GottaLaff

No, not "shoo, fly!"... Shoes fly. And for good reason: Boy Georgie, aka Mr. Popularity, opened his big yap:

Speaking to a $400-a-seat crowd in Montreal, Bush told the roughly 1,000 attendees that his presidential decisionmaking was principled and moral.

These presidential decisions (follow link)?

"I am confident that I made decisions based on principle, that I made calls as best I could, and I did not sell my soul," Bush said.

Let's give him the benefit of the doubt. He didn't sell his soul.

He gave it away.

A throng of protesters burned a flaming effigy of the former president, who's taken his stump speech on the road across Canada. [...]

A protest organizer encouraged Bush opponents to bring old shoes, in reference to an Iraqi who threw a shoe at the President during a speech late in his presidency.

And finally, a message from his biggest fan:

In Edmonton, where Bush spoke earlier this week, a protester toted a representation of the Grim Reaper, which boasted a sign saying, "GWB I am your biggest fan" and "Thanks for 8 great years."

Ottawa's refusal to take Gitmo inmates irks U.S.

By GottaLaff

The Rushpublics will use this to point out what an abysmal failure Obama is, of course. Then they'll cheer and rave and laud their boy Bush's Canadian clone:

An apparent snub by the Canadian government has dismayed officials on the Obama administration's task force who are working to resettle dozens of detainees here and close the prison, a high-ranking White House official told the Star. [...]

But the official, who has intimate knowledge of the negotiations and who spoke to the Star on the condition he not be named, said Canada abruptly stopped talks earlier this year. He said the task force was surprised to learn of Canada's decision through a press release.

Keeping secrets, snubs, being non-communicative... That's not being a very good neighbor, now is it?

"I just found it puzzling," there were no phone calls or diplomatic meetings, the official said. "A public rejection was odd."

Maybe they have a crush on a new country? Anyone know if they've returned our CDs?

Canada's position is in contrast to other countries eager to curry favour with the U.S. administration by helping Obama's apparent Sisyphean task to close Gitmo. [...]

But Prime Minister Stephen Harper's press secretary told the Star that Canada's position under both the Bush and Obama administrations had been consistent.

"We're not interested in bringing detainees from Guantanamo Bay to Canada," said Dimitri Soudas. "In the case of other detainees who are not Canadian citizens and don't have a connection to Canada, there is no justification for us to bring any such individuals to Canada."

Right from the Rushpublic talking points. Those sly foxes. Have they been streaming Boss Limpdong again?

"We're still hoping Canada will help," he said. "We can't do this alone."

That was the message Obama's Guantanamo czar tasked with closing the prison brought to Ottawa this spring.

Okay, there it is. It's that whole "czar" thing. I may have to start a "czar rights" movement. Who's up for a Million Czar March? Hands?

The official told the Star the Canadian government was keen to keep quiet the meeting that U.S. Special Envoy Daniel Fried had this spring. Various options for the detainees were discussed and Obama's task force was told that the meeting had been "promising."

But only a week later, Harper's office told journalists that Canada would not accept any Guantanamo detainees – surprising the task force, the official said.

Advocacy groups have argued that Canada's position on Guantanamo has stained its international reputation as a leader in the field of human rights.

"The Obama administration is trying to do the right thing, the very thing Canada was asking the United States to do for so long. It's pathetic that Canada now won't lift a finger to help, especially since so many other NATO allies are doing their part," said Tom Malinowski, Washington director of Human Rights Watch. [...]

The official would not speculate whether Canada's apparent snub would hinder relations between the two countries.

But Gar Pardy, the former head of Canada's consular programs, said he would be surprised if it didn't create a chill.

"The administration is saying, 'Look, we've inherited all this stuff. We're looking for a solution here and we would expect getting some help from our friends and we're not getting any.' "

Harrumph! Some bff. Maybe we should have started by asking for a simple detainee sleepover and taken it from there.

H/t: Tymlee