Hey John Sidney McMuddy, how's Steve Schmidt working out for you?

By GottaLaff

John Sidney McMuddy just can't seem to pull it together, no matter who's running the show:

Last week, the Republican presidential candidate elevated Steve Schmidt, a veteran of the tightly controlled Bush 2004 campaign, to head day-to-day operations, hoping to clear up muddiness in McCain's message.

There you have it: McCain's muddied message mires momentum.

At the Denver Center for Performing Arts, the advance team set up not one but three teleprompters to make McCain's often stilted delivery more natural. He still missed a few words, but appeared more practiced.

McMuddy just can't seem to get the hang of them durned telepr0mpters, can he?

Technicians toned down the house lights to avoid drawing attention McCain's white hair.

Wait. McMuddy is... old?

There was even new music. The jarring mix of Abba and techno beats at McCain's events was replaced by songs from homespun country crooners -- Rascal Flatts' "Mayberry" and Alan Jackson's "Tequila Sunrise."

And thank you for playing "Cringeworthy Republican Campaign Decisions!"

Though McCain fielded far-flung questions, he managed to hit his central themes -- which has not always been the case.

Steve Schmidt has shown himself to be a real asset... to the Obama campaign. Thanks Steve! Y'all come back now, hear?