John Sidney McObama

By GottaLaff


Ooo! I'm John Sidney McWannaBe and I wanna be all sunny and cheery and Yes-We-Canny too! Pick me! Pick me! Uh-oh, but watch out for them sneaky little disclaimers:

Today, McCain's promises for the future were sunny. Acknowledging that he "cannot guarantee" achievement of each goal, he went on to lay out a series of hopeful proposals for foreign and domestic policies: Within four years of his inauguration, he said, a new flatter tax will save Americans billions of dollars; the genocide in Darfur will be ending; the border will be secure; Osama bin Laden will be dead or captured; there will be more jobs and less obese kids; commander-in-chief McCain will be holding weekly press conferences; and Democrats will be a part of his administration.

Gosh oh gee, if Sid McPromises is elected, all those nasty negatives from the Bush years will turn into big yellow Happy Faces! Who knew? He's so fun and positive. Pick him! He's the swellest of all!

But, in his remarks at the Greater Columbus Convention Center this morning, the greatest applause may have come during McCain's clarion call to cease and desist with partisan bickering. "This mindless, paralyzing rancor must come to an end," he declared.

The applause was long and loud. But no cheers -- quite -- of "Yes, We Can."

Yes we could? Yes we might? Yes we can if Obama doesn't do it first? Too late.

Sorry, Sid, but all that crunchy-goodness-Obama II hope doesn't have much, whaddyacallit, credibility. We remember when you dismissed all that as just a slogan. Yes we do.