ARIvederci, Tiger

By GottaLaff



Love 'em and leave 'em:

Meanwhile, former White House press secretary Ari Fleischer acknowledged in an e-mail to the AP that he had been working for Woods and had decided to withdraw.

The AP gives no reason for Fleischer’s departure, but FoxSports reports that Fleischer “fell on his sword because he felt he was becoming the story": “[...] Having him in behind the curtain gave the impression Woods had something to hide, and that words were being fed to him.”

Pfft, why would Woods have anything to hide?

Ari-vederci, Tiger.

It was bad while it lasted.

H/t: Ellen

Tiger Woods hires Ari Fleischer

By GottaLaff

This is who Tiger Woods hires to get us to accept him again? With smarmy representatives like this, who needs enemies?

If this is how Tiger intends to rebuild his image, why not just hire Karl Rove? Or Mark Sanford? Or Tickle Me Massa?

How to cement Worst Judgment in the World status:

Two sources in the golf community have told The Post that Ari Fleischer, the former presidential advisor to George W. Bush and the man who was brought in to help repair the steroid-shattered image of Mark McGwire, has been huddling with Woods, plotting a strategy for his return to golf — at the Arnold Palmer Invitational starting March 25 at Bay Hill in Orlando.

That did it. I can't even look at the guy now...

... as if I could before.

VIDEO: Ari in "Fleischerland" v. Paul Begala on torture

By GottaLaff

CNN's Anderson Cooper Hosts: Democrat Paul Begala & Republican Ari Fleischer Bitching At Each Other, Over Torture, Investigations, etc etc - 05/14/09

Ari in Fleischerland: "You just want to go after George Bush and call it non-partisan"

Ari Fleischer: "I’ll be proud to testify if I get a subpoena. I’m proud of what we did...”

By GottaLaff

Go ahead, Ari, make our day:

He argued that neither Congress nor anyone else is up to the task, and that any investigation would “lead to acrimony and blame-gaming” and “devolve into the worst type of partisanship.” While noting that “no one likes to get a subpoena,” Fleischer said, “I’ll be proud to testify if I get a subpoena. I’m proud of what we did to protect this country.” Those wanting to see Fleischer—or at least some of his former colleagues—on the witness stand include his fellow panelists Noonan, who called for a 9/11 Commission-style investigation, and Tina Brown, who quoted Senator Patrick Leahy’s contention that “before you can turn a page, you want to read it.” When moderator (and Media Project host) Gideon Yago brought up the idea of a special prosecutor, Fleischer sternly pointed out that “that assumes a crime has been committed.”

Ari just admitted he's proud of being part of the gang of thugs that committed war crimes. That was big of him. Remind me to thank him with a smile as he's carted off to prison.

Today, Sen. Robert Byrd (D-WV) also demanded an investigation into Bush's torture program. "To continue to ignore the mounting evidence of clear wrongdoing is a national humiliation," writes Byrd.

Yes, let's try that. Let's investigate, just to give Ari a chance to show us how proud he is when he's convicted of war crimes. And as he's being cuffed and chained, can someone please read him the definition of "protect"?

AC 360- Paul Begala bests Ari Fleischer on torture

Transcript here.

VIDEO-- Hardball: Chris Matthews v. Ari Fleischer, the sequel

By GottaLaff

Ari Fleischer doesn't appear on Hardball in this round, but there's enough residue to go around. Oh, and this is the segment from which I got this quote:

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

Yesterday, Paddy posted the video of Fleischer's infuriating, condescending appearance on Hardball. Here's the sequel, including Chris Matthews' response to one rather vital snippet of Fleischer's perpetuation of BushCo lies that he missed during the original interview.

Oh my g-d

Chris Matthews just went there with Ari Fleischer. "How can you say Bush kept us safe when Bush was in charge when we were hit on 9/11". Oh. My. G-d. Fleischer went into total meltdown, accusing Matthews of something like, I don't remember, being disgraceful. Added- Lordy, Ari is just being the most offended person in the world.

Video when I get it.

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

Enjoy.

Ari Fleischer very "concerned" over President's tactics

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

Poor thing, he's sooo disappointed.

1600 Pennsylvania Ave - Shuster and Ari Fleischer on Limbaugh, and what 'patriotic' really means...

The thing that kept on going thru my mind with this segment was to wonder who is paying Ari's keep these days. He seemed too on "message" to be just having a chat. Via FDL.

Added- Barb connects the dots.

Overwhelming

By GottaLaff

Sometimes there is so much wankery out there that I become overwhelmed and can't decide which wankitudage to post. Then it comes to me. I link, you decide:

• Jindal Rejects $90 Million In Recovery Funding That Would Have Benefited 25,000 Louisiana Residents

• Fred Kagan: ‘The Iraqis Were Not Bitching’ About Civilian Deaths Because They ‘Sort Of Accept’ Them

• Fleischer: On Iraq, ‘Saddam was the big liar.’

• Phil ‘mental recession’ Gramm attempts to resuscitate his reputation.

• Greta Van Susteren Falsely Claims Obama Has Only Visited States He Won: ‘It Looks Like A Reward’

(All links via Think Progress)

There. Now we can have one big group rant.

VIDEO-- Ari Fleischer to Bush on press conferences: "You get a lot of dot coms and other oddballs who come in there."

By GottaLaff


One must never include oddballs in one's pressers. Especially librul ones. Especially Huffington Post. Via Think Progress:

Ana Marie Cox writes that there was "lots of grumbling" after the press conference about Huffington Post getting a question.

Welcome to our world, grumblers. Diversity in the press. What a concept.

Bush is a saint

By GottaLaff

I'm watching Larry King Live right now, and the panel consists of Dana Perino, Ari Fleischer, Josh Bolten, and Andy Card. Gosharootie, they're polite, conscientious, and respectful. And they smile as if they mean it. They're the bestest!

Why, had it not been for these fine, unimpeachable* standard-bearers of Republican values, I might have continued to believe that Bush is a despicable, lying, cowardly, drunken, imbecilic, shallow, murderous, delusional, sadistic piece of excrement.

But after soaking in the lavish praise and reverence of this lustrous team of devotees, and even learning that Bush is someone who "never stifles debate", I'll have to do some serious rethinking. How could I have been so wrong?

*Literally.