"Off With Those Pants": Bill O'Reilly Seduces You in Clips From His Dirty Audiobook

Oh. My. We're having some fun with these. WARNING- DO NOT LISTEN TO IF YOU HAVE RECENTLY EATEN OR ARE ABOUT TO EAT. Audio clips from-

Last week, when your Crap Archivist got all aghast about the inexcusable creepiness that is The O'Reilly Factor For Kids, I failed to point out something important: horrifying as it is, The O'Reilly Factor For Kids is far from Bill O'Reilly's worst - or creepiest -- book.

That honor goes to Those Who Trespass, his 1998 novel about an O'Reilly-esque TV journalist who is trained by an Irish Republican Army terrorist to kill the people who deserve it the most: the broadcast news bastards who interfered with the O'Reilly character's career. It's personal on the political level, too -- his victims includes a powerful "bitch" named Hillary and a fat "slob" named Martin Moore.