Infiltrating the Republican Lincoln Day Dinner

By GottaLaff

Please. Just go read this. Then start shaking your head back and forth very slowly and roll your eyes. Here's a teaser or two:

Doesn't it suck how Sarah gets picked on because she's a woman?

Pop Goes the Weasel

The rest of the room had no idea she’d arrived, and when she walked in, some guy yelled, “SARACUUUDA!” which was followed by rapturous applause. The woman next to me gushed, “Oh my gosh, she’s soooo pretty!” She proceeded to hug, and smile, and sign autographs, and talk and hug and sign autographs, and smile….and eventually Dan Sullivan, like the goobery kid at the dance, came over and had to literally tug on her sleeve to get her to pay attention to him. Glasses were clinked with knives, and a hush fell on the room. “Nothing would make me happier than to work with Dan Sullivan as mayor,” she said. Wow. Nothing? Then she went on to say that Dan Sullivan’s sister works in her office.

Was that teasey enough for you?