"Daddy feels God was using [Palin] to wake America up"

By GottaLaff

::Ring! Ring!::

America: Zzzzzzz huh, wuzzat? Someone get the phone. Where's a dedicated patriot when you need one... zzzzzzzz.

::Ring! Ring!::

America: Just 5 more months... Not awake yet... 5 more... Will someone pick it up? I'm still exhausted from 2001-2008, for Dems'sake!

::Ring! Ring!::

America: Okay, okay... geez. Hello? Whoever this is, it better be good....

Palin: Sonowyoubetchahowever ya might wanna open those red, white and blue peepers there, moreoveralsotoo, don'tcha know! Time to watch me on TeeVee and the YouTubes, also! Gotta go! There's a bus waitin'! And I'm due for some more fancy quittin'!

God: Ha! I so punk'd America!

Sarah Palin "took a detour from her book-signing tour Sunday to dine with Billy Graham," the Charlotte Observer reports.

Said son Franklin Graham: "He's followed her career and likes her strong stand on faith. Daddy feels God was using her to wake America up."

America: STFU, Palin. I'm so over you.

UPDATE:

FreeTortureReport.com

From WaterTiger and friends.