Joe the Not-Plumber claims he was on Obama's enemies list

By GottaLaff

Awww, poor Joe Sam the Plumber Nutcase. Everyone reach for a Kleenex on 3. Ready? One. Two. Three:

Judicial Watch formally filed a federal civil rights law suit on behalf of Samuel Joseph Wurzelbacher, Joe the Plumber today. It alleges that "officials of the State of Ohio violated Mr. Wurzelbacher's constitutional rights by illegally accessing confidential information from its official databases," per Thomas Fitton, president of Judicial Watch.

Okay, maybe that has some merit, maybe not. But that's not important now. What is important is this:

"It is our contention that there is an open question whether Joe the Plumber was number one on Obama's enemies list," Fitton said, referring to the alleged White House enemies list including Rush Limbaugh. "We already have evidence that government officials were misusing government resources to, in our view, to try harm our client for speaking out against Mr. Obama."

What?! Why, that's outrageous! Team Obama has... an enemies list? With enemies on it? Like that crazy Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, and the mass murderer Osama bin Laden, and... a fake plumber?

Fitton said four days after Wurzelbacher's interaction with Obama on Oct. 12, 2008, the three highest ranking employees of the Ohio Department of Job and Family Services at the time held a meeting where they discussed Joe the Plumber. Fitton also said the three Ohio employees, who Fitton said are "believed to have been supporters of Obama's presidential campaign," then instructed agency personel to search confidential databases for information about Wurzelbacher.

Those awful supporters! I bet they were sitting around dissing Sam's wardrobe and... and... choice of scalp-care products. That is like, so Facebook!

Wait, what? The media was in on this, too? Totally talking trash about, like, Sam and stuff? That's it. Media? If this happens one more time, I'm coming over there and confiscating your Blackberries!

"Mainstream media has done their best to discredit everything and anything about me," Wurzelbacher said, telling reporters he can no longer find work as a plumber after this incident. "I'm actually making less than what I made as a plumber. He [Obama] has damaged me in that aspect as well."

Curse you, Prez O! Curse you and your kind! The horrific economy is now affecting Sam's plumberless jobs! And it's all your fault!

Wurzelbacher said allegations of not having a plumbing license is not to blame. Instead, he said, people may like his work but say he overcharged, etc if they do not agree with him politically. Wurzelbacher is now doing some reporting work for Pajamas Media.

I guess becoming an instant celebrity hasn't paid off. Hmm? Whazzat? Sam has a book deal? Man, that is rough!

Fitton said this suit is for all Americans who dare to question an elected official or candidate.

"Anyone watching what happened to Joe the Plumber is going to think twice about asking a question of a presidential candidate in the future," Fitton said.

Yeah! And if anyone knows about asking questions of Prez O, it's Henrietta Hughes. All she got out of it was a hug from the president himself and a place to live. She really ought to give some serious thought to suing him.

US diplomat challenges Clinton's appointment

By GottaLaff

Here we go again:

A US diplomat has filed a lawsuit charging that Hillary Clinton's appointment as secretary of state is unconstitutional, a watchdog group representing him said Thursday.

The lawsuit filed by David Rodearmel argues that Clinton is "ineligible" for the job because the Senate approved, while she was a senator, a salary raise for her predecessor Condoleezza Rice, Judicial Watch said in a statement. [...]

In the lawsuit filed in a Washington court, Rodearmel wrote that "for almost a century, administrators of both parties have used various legal maneuvers to avoid complying with the constitution's emoluments clause."

He added: "I am bringing suit to finally resolve this issue and to seek compliance with the manifest tenor of the constitution."

Knock yourself out.

Hillary Clinton's future paycheck cut

By GottaLaff

There now. Another calamity averted. Someone Blackberry Scalia:

Hillary Clinton's pay check has officially been cut.

Congress voted Wednesday night to reduce the Secretary of State's salary back to its pre-2007 level of $186,000 to conform to a clause in the constitution stipulating a member of congress cannot be appointed to a government job if the position's salary has increased during the lawmaker's current term. [...]

Judicial Watch said it was illegal for Clinton to be nominated to the post since President Bush authorized a nearly $5,000 pay raise for job last January. [...]

But lawmakers have gotten around the clause before in the same fashion they have now: with Congress changing the salary of the office in question back to what it originally was.

It happened when Ohio Sen. William Saxbe was named President Nixon's attorney general in 1974 and again when Texas Sen. Lloyd Bentsen became President Clinton's Treasury secretary in 1993.

Hillary will make about $10,000 more as Secretary of State than she does now as a senator.