BREAKING: Blago's (endless) lament

By GottaLaff

HairMan is lamenting about his kicked-outitude:

Blago is telling us how much he did for the state of Illinois. "Do unto others as you'd have them do unto you." He's going to keep fighting to clear his name.

He says he loves us.

He took no questions. Bye, BlagoHairovich.

Oops, he's back. Too bad, I thought we finally got rid of him. Ohhh, it's because he forgot to speak Spanish. He's doing that now.

Okay, now he's taking questions. He's asking some little kid if he wants to be on the Tee Vee Machine. In fact, he's really pushing the little kid to be on the Tee Vee Machine. Blago? The little kid doesn't want to be on the Tee Vee Machine.

He's asking if the press will still cover him. No, seriously, he came right out and asked them.

He's going to keep fighting for "those without a voice". And remember, and never forget, he provided health care to his peeps. He tells us that a lot.

"This is a valley in our lives."

He predicted the unamimous vote. "The fix was in." He really likes that phrase, he says it several times daily.

He's telling the little kid he's old enough to vote, because he lives in Chicago. The little kid screamed, "Yaaayyy!"

He's discussing his immigrant father, and getting a little maudlin. "I didn't do anything wrong." (That wasn't the maudlin part.)

"I'll have more to say later." That's an understatement.

"It was a fore-ordained result... I'd like to tell ya some of the inside stuff."

He's saying this could happen "to you." Now I'm scared. I didn't realize I could be impeached.

He's repeated that he was twice-elected more than... well, twice. "It was a fixed deal from the beginning." "My prediction was right. They pitched a shutout 59 to nothin'."

He's been fighting for bigger principles, he says. He's quoting Dr. Martin Luther King now.

Chris Matthews just said, "He said the point is mute." Yes, Tweety said, "mute."

Tweety: "He did brilliantly... he went after every erogenous zone in the Democratic party."