Meghan McCain: My dad's campaign killed my love life

By GottaLaff

John McCain killed his daughter's love life? Good lord, he's romantically homicidal? Then again, consider McCain's own "love life". What am I saying? Does anyone seriously believe that he still---? That anyone would---? That Cindy is attracted to---? That there is one ounce of warmth between the two of---?

I'll stop now. But I do have one question: Why are the Obamas still so smoldery and steamy if politics kills libidos?

Meghan McCain says that "nothing kills my libido quite like discussing politics" — and that the presidential election "killed my personal life."

"OK, maybe killed is a bit of an exaggeration," she wrote in a blog post for The Daily Beast published Monday. "But it does seem to be on life support. Of all the things people warned would happen post-election, no one ever said anything about how complicated dating would become. Especially if your dad loses the election."

I can see it now... Meghan: "You only date me for my dad."

Date: "Only if he pulls this election off, Megs. Say his name again. God, are you as turned as I am?"

"There are things that have been difficult, but nothing quite as tough as dating. I fear the election has destroyed my ability and desire to date. Now, I cannot say at any point in my life that I have been very good at dating. But I have become something I used to despise: people who let politics dictate his or her attraction to someone."

That doesn't sound very inclusive.

She said one fan of her mother, Cindy McCain, recently told her she could be "his Cindy," and asked if she ever wore pearls like her mother did. "Any guy that has a fetish for older women in pantsuits and large pearls obviously only finds my last name attractive about me," she wrote.

Okay, ew. E. W. Ew.

McCain said she did not care who her friends supported during the campaign, and that she believed political views were personal —

Good for her. Seriously. That's how it should be. Go, Meghan!

[...] "I promise, no one is more surprised by this revelation than I am. … If I am adult enough to understand that voting is one of the most personal things a person can do, why am I letting it affect how attracted to someone I am? I know that no one can really explain sexual attraction and why you are drawn to someone or not — but at this point in time, nothing kills my libido quite like discussing politics."

You might also try removing the McCain/Palin pin before getting intimate. Getting jabbed by one of those things can be a real mood killer.

She said she was "turned off" both by supporters of President Obama — and her father's backers. "Recently, over dinner, a guy started explaining his reasons for supporting President Obama during the election (I didn’t ask, I think the poor guy felt guilty) and I immediately found any attraction I had previously had dissipate," she wrote. [...] Let’s just say I’m spending a lot of time writing and even more time with my girlfriends."

All kidding aside, I'm actually very sympathetic to Meghan and her plight. It's a jungle out there.

"At this point, my biggest aphrodisiac is an apathetic attitude toward politics. ..."

Really? That's all it takes? She can single-handedly drive Big Pharma into the ground with that advice. Viagra-takers, take note.

And Meghan, we sympathize. Being the child of a big-name politician can't be easy. Hang in there.

VIDEO: Rahm Emanuel roasts Stephen Colbert

By GottaLaff

Via Huffington Post we get Rahm roasting Colbert, and Colbert firing back, and then some. It's 30 minutes long, pretty echo-y, and a tad rough, but who cares, right? So get yourself into a comfy position at the computer and prepare to laugh:

White House chief of staff-designate Rahm Emanuel took some time off from the transition Friday night to hurl barbs at his longtime pseudo-nemesis Stephen Colbert (as well as Joe Biden, Sarah Palin, Joe Lieberman, et al...)

Colbert was roasted as part of a charity event for the Spina Bifida Association, organized every year by Judy Woodruff and Al Hunt. (Click here to donate to the cause.)

[V]ideographer/journalist Liz Glover was kind enough to pass along video of the event.

Here's a little of what Rahm said:

On Sarah Palin, John Edwards, Hillary Clinton, and Joe Lieberman: "I'm scared of Stephen Colbert. I'm not alone. My colleagues in Congress, political operatives, the top minds in Washington, even some of the people in this room -- we're all scared of Stephen Colbert... We're scared of Stephen Colbert in the same way Sarah Palin is scared of a geography bee. We're scared of him the same way that John Edwards is scared of the National Enquirer. Mary Matalin is scared of Stephen, and she's seen Carville naked! ... Even Hillary Clinton is scared of Colbert, and this makes no sense to me -- she is a woman who braved sniper fire at the Battle of Bosnia's Airport. We're frightened of Colbert, but we know that deep down, underneath the Republican character you see on TV, there's still a good man, there's still hope for him. It's the same way we feel about Joe Lieberman."

Here's a snippet from Colbert:

On Chris Matthews: "Chris Matthews is here tonight, thank you so much for coming here tonight. People are asking, how did he come here, doesn't he have a show? Well what people don't know is that many nights, Chris just puts a blond wig on a potato and nobody notices. You're a good man -- good luck in Pennsylvania on that run."

For more of the text, go here.